I’m battling the summer fatso blues
SOLVING YOUR WORK-LIFE PROBLEMS
I’m about to go on holiday with my girlfriend to Ibiza but I’m feeling really rubbish about my body. This summer has been massive on nights out and picnics and I’ve gained half a stone. I’m going to look awful next to all those six-packed hunks and I’m worried my girlfriend will go off me. Any tips for getting out of this self esteem rut? Max, 29, wealth management
YOU’RE right to get in touch about this because body consciousness is a serious downer. And hats off to you, as men often feel they have to tough such things out – wash away their discomfort with a few more pints, for example.
Unfortunately there are only two solutions: one long-term, one short-term. In the short term, you could do a healthy fast. How much time do you have? Even four days can take the edge off: it’s amazing what a few days of serious virtue can do for self-image. Other people may not notice anything in that short a period, but you will, and you’ll hold your head higher. There are various detox plans you could explore for fast results: do so with caution, though, as starvation isn’t going to be the answer. Men bulk up fast, so you could pound the gym every day for a week and expect to see some results. This is not generally the way to get in shape and lose weight, but taking action will really make you feel better. And confidence is half the battle. Oh, and wear a top on the beach if it makes you feel better.
The longer term solution, of course, is a diet and exercise plan that takes the pounds off slowly but also fits in with your life. I’d also suggest some therapy – it would be a good way to get to the bottom of your body issues and to deal with any self esteem problems lurking away dangerously.
As for this holiday, share your feelings with your girlfriend: women really appreciate men opening up about their insecurities. Don’t do it in a sappy, self-pitying way, but if you admit you’re feeling sensitive about yourself, she may help dissuade you from any paranoia you might exhibit when she talks to a hot waiter or similar.
Women are no strangers to body concerns: we’re constantly comparing ourselves to leggier and thinner and browner beach babes. And we have been taught by society to ruthlessly criticise our physical appearance. I’m not saying it’s the same thing, but I think you could find a good listener in your girlfriend – quite possibly better than your mates. Now, go forth and enjoy. [email protected]